Even if The Dream Was Real - So what?

Article #2 -"Even if the dream was real. So what?"

I had a dream the other night, a dream I often have off and on. The dream is usually about being back in school and I have to sit for an exam. Of course, in this dream, I am totally unprepared and that would put me in a state of panic and fear. Would I fail? How will I answer the questions? I don't remember ANYTHING! I would wake up in a panic but feel incredibly relieved that it was merely a dream. "It's just a dream, it's just a dream." I would repeat to myself.

"It's alright to fail at something."

But today, I felt different. I had that dream, but when I woke up, I was calm. I didn't feel that panic or fear. This time, I thought to myself, "Even if the dream was real. So what?". I realized that it's okay to fail an exam. It's alright to fail at something. Why this fear of failing? Why let it consume me?

I believe that many people have the same dream, might be a different setting but the premise of the dream is the same. Isn't that odd? I guess it's similar to the dream of falling from a great height. Many people have that dream too. 

"I am rather hard on myself, and most times, I feel that failure is really not an option. But yes, this time, that particular morning, I said to myself, "So what!"."

I realize that I often have this dream when I am under some stress. My stress triggers this dream. After waking up that morning, when I developed that particular 'So what?' attitude towards the dream, I contemplated on things a bit. How did I develop this sudden realization or acceptance that it is TRULY alright to fail at something? I am rather hard on myself, and most times, I feel that failure is really not an option. But yes, this time, that particular morning, I said to myself, "So what!".

"I realized that life is a series of exams one after the other. We will ALL face many different exams."

I thought and thought and put more thought into things and this is how I could sum things up. I realized that life is a series of exams one after the other. We will ALL face many different exams. It could be an exam on sickness or even financial difficulties. We will all face our own unique exams and we are expected to pass with flying colors or at least, WE expect ourselves to. I believe that expectations from others can be difficult to handle, but really, the expectations you put YOURSELF up to can be rather unrealistic and sometimes brutal. When we do not pass the exam, we beat ourselves up or worse, we just give up. We don't realize that we can take the test again, and try once more to pass it. It's not an 'End all, be all' situation. It's really not the end of the world (yes, this sounds harsh, do forgive me) if we don't pass the first time round. We actually get to resit the test again and again until we pass.  Hence, the real test I believe is not the test itself, it's how patient, motivated and disciplined enough we are to keep on trying.

Most of us, when faced with these life exams, we tend to stress out. We give in to the stress and end up making things harder and we have to struggle. When we give in to the stress, we really make the exam much harder and more difficult to pass. When we are stressed, we won't be able to remember things well, we would not feel at ease and the inevitable sense of panic sets in. We waste much energy and time stressing over even the smaller exams.

"These exams have a purpose, either to make us stronger or build up facets of our lives that are in some way lacking."

To really solve this issue of stress, we need to understand that tough times will pass. No matter how big and unsolvable the problem is, it will pass. We WILL get through it. And of course, we need to surrender to the fact that everything happens for a reason. Life has a purpose. These exams have a purpose, either to make us stronger or build up facets of our lives that are in some way lacking.

 "In my opinion, we don't have a choice. We MUST act and play the part given."

Another way of putting it, apart from the 'life is an exam' version. Another analogy is that our life is simply a drama. The script of our drama or movie has been written. There are many things that we cannot control in the script. We need to memorize our lines, learn the timing and act the role we were given in the movie. In my opinion, we don't have a choice. We MUST act and play the part given. BUT, yes, at the end of the day, after acting, we get to go back home, unwind and relax and more importantly, detach ourselves from the role and script. At the end of the day, or should I say, at the end of the issue or problem we face, we are simply ourselves. Detachment is really the key. The script, the role that you play in the movie DOES NOT define who you are in real life.

"By putting the problems/scenarios/scripts aside, we can detach from it and be ourselves."

I guess simply put, the movie script can be seen as the problems or scenarios we go through in life and we must go through them, just as how actors must play their roles. By putting the problems/scenarios/scripts aside, we can detach from it and be ourselves. We can even analyze it, gain perspective and be able to make improvements to the script. I guess the main point, is not to lose yourself within the movie script. Be yourself regardless of what life throws at you. Never lose yourself.  

Have you heard of the term Kosha? According to Vedantic philosophy, self realization involves 5 sheaths or layers. Often Kosha is visualised as an onion with 5 outer layers.

Layer 1 
(Outermost layer) 

Physical - Annamaya kosha 

Layer 2

Energy - Pranamaya kosha 

Layer 3

Mental - Manamaya kosha 

Layer 4

Wisdom - Vijnanamaya kosha 

Layer 5

Bliss - Anandamaya kosha 

The core 
(Or in other ways of looking at it, the core of the onion)

Self - Atman

Kosha can even be seen as a Vedantic version of the popular, Maslow's hierarchy of needs whereby the top most level of the pyramid is self actualisation.

Why talk about Kosha? Perhaps I will go into the concept in more detail in another post. In short, I see the outer layers as our environment. Our problems, our issues, even things we need to live. These outer layers causes us to lose our original self which is the core. Which is light and pure happiness. We really need to stay in touch with our core. What makes us, truly 'us'.

I am uncertain if I will continue having the same exam related dream. Perhaps I still will in future, but this time, I will wake up telling myself simply,"So what?".

Namaste,

Jo

source: http://www.bhakti-yoga-meditation.com/